Understanding human psychology from the point of view of a non-psychologist

When I opened my google doc to write this article, my mind went blank.

I didn’t know what to write.

The white space on my screen felt huge, and I felt like I was truly a fraud of great ideas - well, not until a thought crossed my mind.

You see, I thought of we humans.

I thought of how we thought and acted - and why we thought this way.

I remembered some of my most memorable interactions with my friends.

This thought just wouldn’t leave my mind. Then an idea crossed my mind for a topic to write.

Before we continue, know that I didn’t actually study psychology in the university.

But once you live, gain unspeakable experiences, read books from interesting authors like Austin Kleon, start a minidegree on Digital Psychology and Persuasion from CXL Institute Scholarship, you feel like you understand what the world truly is about.

Then you realize you actually don’t…

Note to self: There’s a story for some other time in this last paragraph.

Anyway, that thought found a way to creep into my mind, and now, I’m actually writing.

If you’re still with me, forgive my ramblings.

For a while now, I’ve had this very strong philosophy about humans being very much alike psychologically.

Let’s look at it this way;

You know how at times you’re in a party, you see someone and think to yourself, “why is that girl so antisocial?” or something along that line.

Well, let’s analyze that thought.

You see, in your mind you believe that you’re vital to the interesting-ness or fun of that group — so you place anyone who doesn’t fit your standard of fun into another bucket.

The funny thing about this style of thinking is that this person you’re assessing in your mind is assessing you as well.

The person is thinking, “why is this person so stuck up?” or “why is this person so loud?”, y’know, something in that line.

From my socializing with people and actively watching and listening to every single conversation with them, I’ve come to realize that as humans, we want everything around us to be in groups.

Take when you fail a test or an examination (even though you ought to feel sad), you jubilate because you have a friend who failed as well (yeah, people do it, even though no one really talks about it).

Or when you win a lottery, you wish your best friend or a family member had won the lottery as well, and so on.

Whatever it is humans do, we want to feel like we belong to a unique group.

That’s why we listen to artists and form fanbases.

It’s why motivational speaking is a thing, and why people download affirmation apps and quotes.

It’s also why people register at gyms, worship in churches, go to the movies, etc., so they can meet other people like them.

So, when next you’re in a gathering and the person next to you doesn’t fit into your idea of a perfect person, remember that like you, that same person is also assessing you as well.